the "last day"

This is my last post for my internship, seeing as yesterday was technically my last day working for Olivia. I just did a rough cut for the prison of choir songs we recorded..."praaa-aaa-aaa-iiissee You!"...sorry...still in my head! I am so grateful that I have been able to work on this project. I loved being able to go out to different locations and shoot, and everything we did I am so blessed to be able to have been a part of. It's opened my eyes so much, and definitely changed me and my perception of what people go through. You hear about these things, but its hard to believe until you actually see it first hand, and go and meet the people it's happened to and see thier situations. so I just want to say thank you for giving me the opportunity to work on this with you! It has given me amazing experiences, definitely opened doors for me, as well as opening my eyes, and that's the most valuable thing.

editing

I've been falling down on the blogging job lately and I appologize! lately all I have been doing is going down to the studio to edit stuff. I think I've done this about 4 times now, I did some subclipping the first day, then started working on the footage of the little kids, and they are still as funny as they were when we filmed them! I can't help but crack up the entire time I'm doing them. last Friday I got to edit some audio files of 911 calls, and those were technically a little easier to do, but were probably some of the hardest things I've ever had to hear. It's like I could picture those little kids in my head, and all I could think of is that one of those little six-year-olds could be my little nephew Tate, because they are the same age, and I couldn't imagine any kid having to go through that at that age. Parents are supposed to be the one thing in a kids life that they can count on and trust to take care of them, and for that to be taken away from these kids is heartbreaking. I feel like since I have been helping with this project my eyes have been opened so much as to what can (and unfortunately does) happen in the world. I'm beginning to realize how important a project like this is, because it is dealing with some of those aspects in life that most of us don't have to deal with directly on a daily basis. we go on, living charmed lives most of the time, and there are people out there who's good day's are still worse than our bad days, and they have to live like that, day in and day out, and most of us don't even take the time to look on the other side of the fence to see it.

Friday trip to CIW

Friday was an early morning. we had to be at the prison in Chino at 8:30 for an interview with the warden, which took longer than we thought because Lieutenant Aaron was dealing with like three other camera crews...they were interesting individuals. the one guy was nice, i think he was from the prison up north. There was one crew though, that, i swear, I've seen some side burns in my day...but these had a mind of their own...they were absolutely baffling, and on top of which were accompanied by a ponytail. the only way this situation could have been any worse was if they had been on a woman. And the guy, who I'm assuming was their leader, was carrying this huge betacam (compensating...?), and tried to start up conversation with us by asking if we were in 24p...yada yada (it was just me and Olivia at this point). I think he had camera envy, and didn't know what to do with himself and was hurt that 2 girls had a better(but smaller) camera than he did. at this point, we had interviewed the warden, left for lunch, and come back, and we got into the auditorium about 20 minutes before everything started, only to find that the guy from up north stole the spot we scouted for my camera, so we just set it up next to him, and we still got the good audio hook-up, so that was cool. Everything was cool with running the camera and everything,(except that the tripod hated me), until my card ran out of time right in the middle of a choir song, and Olivia had the other two, so I had to dig for a tape, switch the camera to tape really fast, and then the computer drive filled up as I was downloading the last card, so I couldn't put it back in...it was a little stressful...I started sweating. I totally thought i was in trouble, and I'm not sure if the tape idea even worked, but hoepfully it's ok. I got to meet BOTH of the Manson girls...which was a trip and a half, and Betty (I guess we're friends now) came up and told me I was so cute AGAIN and wanted to ADOPT me...I didn't really know how to respond to that, i guess if my own parents ever get sick of me...?

Oh, and I got to meet Lindsey Wagner too...and to be honest I'm more of a Chevy girl, but it was still exciting.

all together it was a very cool day. long, but worth getting up at 7 for! It's like an adventure every time...very cool.

Im a bad transcriber.

I feel terrible because I have been working on the same guy for like, a month, and i tried to get at least 1 done a week or so, but I have fallen down on the job. I am almost done. I only have about 10 mins left out of 2 CD's, so they will be done tonight...YAY! I really don't mind doing it, Michele and glenda were both really easy to do, but this guy stutters, and then talks really really fast, and then breaks off right in the middle of one sentance to start a completely different and abstract thought. It's been challenging, but it's all part of the experience! look at me go. 2 blogs in one day. go me!

my second prison visit!

ok, so i admit i am a few days behind on my blogging, so I apologize to the whopping handful (ok, 2 or 3) of you that have to read this. I got to go to the prison last monday again, which was cool- is it bad that it really does remind me of "cell block tango" from "Chicago"? without the black pleather and fishnets, of course... that song was in my head the entire time we were there. I don't know why I find it so fascinating to be there but i do, however, no plans to ever stay indefinitely. Anyway, we got there and basically set up the hallway for the "confessional", Im not sure what else to call it, and then strapped Clark into his robo-cam gear, which, Im actually surprised he was still able to breathe, i had him in there pretty tight...kinda funny...anyway, then we sat and waited for all the women to get through the dinner line and come to the meeting. During the meeting Clark got footage of all the women standing up and giving small testimonies (and about knocked one woman out with the camera...TOO funny!), and I was the Boom-Girl. I am actually sad we didn't get some of that one blonde woman from, i think it was a therapy group for released women, i forget her name... she reminded me a little of a Sheri Oteri skit on SNL. spastic woman. The only part I was bummed about was that I wasn't out in the hallway to hear Patricia's testimony...I can't wait to see that footage! anyway, that was about it, and as we were taking down and packing up Betty Broderick came up and started talking to Clark and I, and told me I was cute (a little unsettling, but I'll take it as a compliment), and then told us a little about what happened to her in regards to her husband's alcohol problem, and how it pertained to her boundaries (which is the focus study of the group right now), or rather lack there-of. It brought me back to reality that I actually was in a prison, with convicted women, which is a fact which i forget so easily, bacause they seem so unthreatening and, for lack of a better word, "normal". so that was pretty much it...it was a good day. afterwards I went home and watched Chicago...

I went to prison today

Today I met Olivia and Clark at the women's prison in Chino for the CWAA meeting. I was a little freaked out because let's face it, I'm a sheltered kid, and I had no idea what to expect...what I had in my head was a cross between "The Green Mile" and "Shawshank Redemption", so I was pleasantly surprised when there were no bars, no water dripping from the cieling, and no inmates yelling profanities out with a half-crazed look in their eye... Security was pretty tight, obviously, and I got in trouble for my shoes, because apparenty if there was something you may need to run away from, you can't run in flip-flops...I did not realize this, but next time I'll know. As we walked through the yard it didn't even feel like prison... it looked to me like I had pictured summer camp as a kid. people telling you where to go and what to do, when to eat, when to sleep, and they all have to wear basically the same thing, and you couldn't go home. I couldn't even take it for a week, let alone YEARS AND YEARS...It's like a society within walls. i do have to say it was cool (in a strange way) to see 2 of the Manson girls, i don't know why...I think that sort of thing just intrigues me. Anyways, seeing all of those women was extremely surreal. You know they're in there for a reason, yet, they look so much like "normal" people, who you see walking down the street every day. They are someone's mom, or sister, or daughter. I think when I realized this as we walked toward the portable where the meeting was held, all the apprehension went away. I couldn't look at these women like they belonged there...They didn't fit the description of "scary criminal" that most of us have been raised or socialized to see them. And while they all have commited some crime in the eyes of the law, I couldn't see that, especially when we got into the room when the CWAA members started coming in. They all seemed so normal, so much like people I know, people in my family, even, and almost right away I forgot I was even in a prison. It was really cool for me to meet Michele, because I think I know the most about her story, and I was really glad to be able to talk to her for even a few minutes, and for all she's been through, and all the crap life has thrown her way, she still has a drive, and there's so much life, and you can see it just by looking at her that she's not bitter, she's taken the worst situation and used it to better herself and others. This experience just goes to show that people are more than what they do, or the crimes they commit, we are more than a sum of our actions and choices.

As far as filming goes, we got the beginning of the meeting, and then the women watched a video, and then discussed it a little bit at the end, and I tried not to get the boom mic in the way of either camera. I do have to say that the german shepard-sized raccoons running across the yard as we were leaving TOTALLY freaked me out...I almost jumped onto the equipment cart...

photoshoot at Avant

Sunday we had a photoshoot over at Avant, and we had make-up artists from L.A. come down and copy actual photos from women who have been beaten by thier partners. there were probably about 15 women of all ages and ethnicities and walks of life. While they went in one at a time, I took a Panasonic and did "behind the scene" type interviews with them while they had thier make-up on, I asked them questions like "does this hit home for you?", and "what does it mean to be able to wash this off after looking at yourself with it on, knowing that there are women who will never be able to wash away the scars?", "how do you think having someone you love and trust do this to you would affect you differently than say, a random mugging?", "why do you think women put up with this happening to them?", "how do you think this relates to emotional abuse, and do you think they are equal, and what are the differences in the scars?" and whatever else I could come up with in the moment. I got so many good answers, some of them almost made me cry, and they DEFINITELY made me think. It was also difficult to see people I knew to have HUGE bruises and blood dripping out of thier nose and open wounds...I knew they weren't really there, but it was difficult to keep the situation in perspective, especially seeing two prof's and 2 classmates with it. after I left I drove around for about a half hour and just cried. I've had bruises from a guy on me before, and it could have gotten so much worse, and it makes me hurt so bad for the women who have had it, and I've had people in my family deal with emotional abuse as well, and it just hit me so hard as to what they have gone through. It was one of the hardest things to come to grips with. On a good note however, the Ikea chair I put together didn't fall apart...thank goodness.

Animal Shelter

Monday I went with Clark and Olivia to the Seal Beach animal shelter. it was a pretty interesting experience to say the least. Now, I consider myself an animal lover, but these people were HARDCORE!! they knew the names of all seventy-some cats and twenty-some dogs...and they made them Valentines!! And the kitten "nursery" was painted specially using pastels...including the cieling, and the sign on the door warned against leaving any "feather or string toys in the nursery unattended"...kitten choking hazzard?!? i wasnt aware that they had to put "3 +" warnings on cat toys... anyways, it was a pretty cool experience, we took a tour of the grounds, and then got an interview with the main "dog" expert, and then the main "cat" expert, and got a lot of good footage that we all thought would add something good to the project, especially when the woman started talking about abuse, and how it begins with animals because they can't fight back, and told us some of the stuff people would do to these animals. it was terrible. mostly i held the boom for the interviews, and help carry the equipment, because there were only three of us. It was really cool to be able to go!

The Shoot!!

Last night I finished the Glenda transcript I got that I have been working on this week, it seems to work out that I do about 1 a week. As with Michele, it left me feeling terrible. I can't even imagine what it is like for these women to go through this, and then be in prison. It makes you realize how messed up the justice system is. there are people walking around free who have actually murdered someone in cold blood, and got out on parole, and these women who, most of them were fighting for thier life, and are now serving life. It's incredible. I just got two new CD's of a lawyer to transcribe today, so that's what I'll be working on this next week. We also had a shoot today from about 9:30/9:45 until about a quarter to 1 at Avant that I thought went really well. It was of about seven kids taking turns and going in front of a greenscreen answering questions. the questions were about how they treat thier friends, how mommies and daddies show love to each other, how they deal with mean kids, if they wanted to get married, things like that. I thought it was so much fun, and the footage will provide a good comic relief to the heavy subject of the film. we have another shoot in about 2 weeks, and then I will probably start organizing the footage to edit.

stuff to do!

So, not a lot going on as far as going on shoots or anything right now, but on Febuary 5 we are heading out to the Women's Prison in Chino (home sweet home) in the afternoon to do some interviews, and on the 7th we are headed up to i think the Valencia area to film at the men's prison for the day. For now I am transcribing interviews. I am on the second one, and have about forty minutes left. I thought I would be able to crank them out pretty fast, but it takes longer than I expected. it takes me about an hour for every ten minutes of speaking...pathetic typing, I know. It is hard stuff to listen to a lot of the time, and it makes me sick about what some of these women went through. toward the end of the last CD i finished last week I couldn't even type any more, I just stopped to listen because I was in shock from what I was hearing. tears were streaming down my face as the woman was describing what she went through, and I got very little sleep that night because I was so disterbed. Hearing things like that make you seriously grateful for everything you have.

First internship blog

Yay! my first blog! I met with Olivia today, my Supervisor for my internship, and we talked about what types of things I would be doing for her over the semester. I got my first assignment, since I will be on my own some of the time to help with the work, and I will be transcribing an interview for the Documentary Sin By Silence.